La La Land

Dad and I visited with Mom today and what a wonderful visit it was!  Mom was napping in the hall outside the dining room with her mouth open, so Dad was giving her a hard time about her snoring.  At one point, she seemed to drift into her world and Dad asked her 'where are you Dianna?' as a means to bring her back to us. She turned and looked at him, and immediately responded - ' La La Land'  Boy did we have a laugh!  Here's a great pic of Mom and Dad.

We stuck around for a couple of hours and really enjoyed our time with her. We helped Mom eat her lunch and took turns sharing stories.  From time to time she'd chime in with a word or two, a cheeky look or glance that told us she was with us and understood some of what we were talking about.  Mom enjoys wearing Dad's ball cap and she looks better in it than he does - ha ha ha!!

Best Place Possible

Visiting Mom at Cumberland Lodge these days makes me realize she is in the best place possible.   My last visit to Comox was at the end of August when I came to see Mom and Dad, and leave Bella with Dad to dog sit, while Lester and I went to Europe: Italy, Greece, Netherlands. What a wonderful family vacation - we were with Mom's siblings and spouses: Doug, Suzi, Linda, Paul, Vicky and Bruce. Lots of great memories that included Mom as we had many opportunities during the trip to reminisce about our travel (and life) experiences with her. This was a trip of a lifetime Mom would not have missed if not for Alzheimer's.  Mom...your presence was strong and with us every day of our journey.

As you might know from reading previous postings, Mom was transferred to a new single room in the 'lock down' section of the Lodge while I was away - mid September. This move was not because Mom is a wanderer (she can't walk), but rather had a lot to do with providing her with the best care at this stage of her life.  In this wing, there are fewer residents - it is a more intimate space. The ratio of caregiver to resident is higher than in the main lodge. So that means she's getting more personal attention and care. Her room is at the end of this wing, and is smaller, cozy and quiet, with a lovely view of the trees outside her window.

For the most part, Mom is doing fine. Some days she has a reoccurring issue with her neck which gets into a hyper-extended position, which seems to go hand-in-hand with congestion, making it a challenge for her to eat and drink.  The staff are not sure why this happens and when it does, they keep a close eye on her. Sometimes they have to use a suction machine to try and extract some of the fluid that gets trapped in the base of her throat.

Other days, she sits up right, seemingly stronger and more alert.  Overall, her disposition is quiet, peaceful and she smiles frequently.  I have a sense the move to this wing was a good one for her.  One of her Caregivers mentioned to me she feels Mom is in the best place possible and has really noticed how she is experiencing less agitation and seems more content and comfortable.

Mom continues to become more introverted - as in she has frequent and longer periods where she goes inward and seems to be in her own world, unaware of her outer surroundings.   When she is experiencing an ability to connect with her outer world and you are there visiting at that time, it's such a gift- a word or two of recognition, a touch and a brilliant 'I know you' smile!

Sights of autumn, Sound of Music and Thanksgiving

After many conversations with Philip some weeks back, it was decided that a fun thing to do would be to come for a visit sometime in the fall.  Given that Thanksgiving was fast approaching, it seemed like that was a logical choice for a visit with Dianna and Phil.
After sharing that with family, Matthew contacted me and said that he thought it would be great to make the trip together by car.  It's a long way, but I had done it last year with Melissa and was game to do it again. 
Plans were laid and ferry reservations were made.  We planned to leave on Saturday Oct 11 and return on Tuesday Oct 14.  That meant making the journey in one day each way.  But we had I-tunes downloaded and the company was good, so off we went. 
Given the weekend celebration of Thanksgiving, I opted for bringing all the fixings of a Thanksgiving Turkey supper.  What fun!
A few days prior to departure, I got a phone call from Lisa saying that Phil had been admitted to hospital with some health concerns.  Although we weren't sure when he would be discharged, we figured we would make the trip and plan the celebration regardless. Lynn and Scott joined us for the weekend too.
We got in late Saturday night and quickly made ourselves comfortable.  Sunday, Matt and Scott headed for a bit of fishing and I started the turkey stuffing.  I had the pleasure of a brief visit with neighbors David and Gil.. time is too short.  In the afternoon, we visited Phil in St. Joseph's and then made our way for the long anticipated visit with Dianna.  It was lovely to see her again, despite some of the clear changes since last being together last year.
The staff at the facility are amazing, competent, gentle, uplifting and respectful.  You can't ask for more.  Several immediately identified the family resemblance and had me pegged for a sister.   Although conversation was sparse, there was still opportunity for sharing and caring.  I have to say it was lovely to see Matt interacting with Dianna in addition to enjoying Scott and Lynn's company during the visit.
Dianna was seated comfortably in her Broda chair in the living room, nicely appointed with a big screen TV and a fireplace.  Very homey and a lovely view of the deck and the autumn colors outside.
Residents, slowly gathered and were offered refreshments.  We were welcomed and included in the social time.  The movie, Sound of Music started to play on the big screen TV.  A timeless film about a family as they met the challenges that they faced together.  One scene in the quiet, was a love song duet.  "So here you are standing here, loving me .... so somewhere in my youth or childhood, I must have done something good".  Yes indeed.  As I turned my head toward my sister, Lynn was holding her hand, while Scott and Matt were gently conversing with Dianna and each other.  This loving scene proved to me that absolutely Dianna ... you did do something good.  Something wonderful and you have the legacy of your family and friends far and wide to prove it.  I love you sister.



 ~~~~~

Later in the day, with the help of Scott, Lynn and Matt in the kitchen, we had a great thanksgiving dinner and made a plate (with extra gravy) to take to Phil. 
The visit was fleeting and the next day we were already making our way back, via Nanaimo, to visit with Linda.  Before doing so of course, we had the opportunity to have one more visit with Dianna.  She looked quiet and peaceful and it was clear that at times she was thinking days past when she was active, possibly reflecting on a meal that she had prepared as she spoke of baking.  Clearly these were happy thoughts as she smiled gently and sweetly. 
I still hear the song I mentioned  in my head.  And I am thankful.