After the virus

I was apprehensive in going to see Dianna after such a long period of lock down. Yes, I had seen her by going to her window and the staff were kind enough to place her at the window so we could see each other. I did this twice. The first time she looked good, smiling and seemed glad to see me. The second time not so good; Dianna seemed to be in agony, gas
ping for breath and rolling her head from side to side. Yes, she recognized me and didn't want me to leave. I only stayed at the window for a short time.There isn't much one can do in these circumstances. I was depressed over this visit. That was about a week before the Lodge was reopened to visitors.

Tuesday's visit was a+. She was glad to see me; we had some tears and she held on to my hand for the whole time. She chatted aimlessly and showed many signed of happiness. Yes she was fine she said (when Dianna can't find the words she somehow manages to communicate) and no, she hadn't gotten sick. This was great news as so many of the residents and staff did go down with the virus. As one who has had it I wouldn't wish it in anybody.

I went to see Dianna on the Wednesday. I surprised her as I went early. She was in the dining area finishing her breakfast. No one else was there. I found out later she had had a bath and was delayed in getting to the table. Dianna loves the bath. Sometimes she is resistant to getting into the tub but not today.

She was in her wheelchair and fully dressed. Dianna often resists the caregivers when they wake her and try to wash her, dress her and get her into her chair. I am told this is not uncommon with Alzheimer's patients. But today was a good day for her. No such resistant.

She was surprised and pleased to see me. I had brought two Starbucks capochinoes which she liked (Di loves Starbucks (even though she can't taste it). We chatted and I was surprised at how articulate she was (Di has lost her ability to communicate with words except on these rare occasions.

In a word, Dianna was"up".

On the Thursday when I went in tho see her she was in her wheelchair in her room, head bent down as if she was sleeping. My first thought was "oh no, she is not having a good day" but I got her going by moving her around in the chair. As always Di seemed glad to see me and pretty soon she was "jibber jabbing"; my way of saying she is talking but it is difficult to understand what she is on about and facial expressions help. For instance, a laugh tells one she has said something funny so you laugh along with her...and the conversation carries on with me saying "yes Dianna or no Dianna". For the most part it seems to work.

I stayed with her through her lunch. The nurse brought me a lunch as well. I can't eat my lunch and feed Dianna as well so I combine the lunches and share it with her.

I forgot to mention that on the Tuesday I brought some cut flowers in for Dianna and a dozen roses for the staff. Over the three day period staff would thank me for the roses and my comment ( You are appreciated). Quite surprised they would be so pleased and it reinforces how important these small gestures of recognition are to people.

Below are some pics I took of Dianna during these visits.

Lodge re-opens to Visitors

Yesterday, the Lodge re-opened after being closed to visitors for 3 weeks due to the Norwalk. Dad was really looking forward to seeing Mom after the long hiatus of course. For Scott and I, it's been over a month!  Far too long when you realize how precious time is.

With the Lodge being closed to visitors over Mother's Day, that meant for first time in many years, I was not with her. At home in North Vancouver, I had mixed emotions that day - sadness and melancholy combined with a sense of gratefulness for the many wonderful memories I have of our excellent adventures. I looked through pictures of the our Mother-Daughter trips and reconnected with all the good times.  Love you Mom and can't wait to see  you soon!!!

Where there is a will, there is a way...

After a week with the Norwalk virus keeping Dad at home and in bed, he's back on his feet and of course, anxious to see Mom.  The Lodge is still closed to visitors as they continue to deal with breakouts of the virus with residents.  Fortunately, Mom continues to dodge the bug and is well!  After calling to see if he could get into see Mom (no was the answer), Dad decided to go up to The Lodge anyways to see if he could sweet-talk his way in.  Here's the email and pics he sent me following his venture to see Mom.

I took a chance and went up to the Lodge today after my Dr's appointment. They are still in lockdown and will be all week as we know. But one of the nurses that knows me came to the door and I asked her how Di was doing...then a crazy idea came to me. She had told me all the residents were in there rooms so I asked if I could see Di through the window.  She thought it was a great idea and readily agreed

As it turned out Di wasn't in her room but in the dining room...so while I waited they brought her into the room right up to the window. She looked good and was quite pleased to see me. She seemed to understand what was happening around her. I told her everyone was concerned for her and suggested I take her picture so they could see she was in good health and happy.

Norwalk Virus at the Lodge

Hi everyone, there has been an outbreak of Norwalk at The Lodge - mild case of it thank goodness, and Mom has managed to dodge it so far.  I talked with the night Nurse last night who said Mom was doing well - big smiles and content. The Lodge is currently in lock-down...no visitors.

Dad on the other hand has likely come down with the nasty thing, having spent the past two days in bed with which-end disease - of which the rear end part has now slowed down and he's taking in small amounts of food - soup, scrambled eggs, yogurt. He's getting great care and attention from David and Gil next door.

Hold tight and never let go

An intimate moment - Dad holding Mom's hand...

Combative and Coping

I'm on a break right now having just finished my job with the BC LDB.  I start my new coaching position with the BC Government May 12th, so am off for about 2 1/2 weeks.

I had a good visit with Mom and Dad before venturing south to the Cowichan Valley where I'm enjoying the quiet natural surrondings in a cabin along the Cowichan River.  Here's a nice pic of Mom taken early this week - lovely smile. She was calm and happy to see us (Bella and I) as always, despite her continuing struggle with her morning routine, making it difficult for Lodge care workers to help her.

During a recent conversation with one of Mom's care aids , she commented "your Mom has been very combative lately" and shared they are calling in a specialist - a Dr. of some kind - Dad...do you know the speciallity? When Dad inquired further as to the strategy in calling in another Dr, they said - to continue to try and discover if there is anything wrong or bothering Mom that she is not able to communicate, or that care staff are not able to determine. They did try Dianna on some new calming meds for a while, but they didn't seem to help much.  Regardless of her current reality, the head nurse continues to reaffirm this type of behaviour is par for the course for a person with advancing Alzheimer's.

I believe Mom's behaviour while combative in nature is her way of coping.